Though out the years of being the mom of a son with severe disabilities, I have encountered all kinds of people and reactions to Joseph. There are mainly three different types of reactions I’ve observed. First, there’s the group of people who look at me sadly and say “what’s wrong with your son?”, followed by a frown and “Poor thing.” After my blood stops boiling and I respond that there’s nothing wrong with him, they walk away with a look of pity on their faces.
Second, there’s the group of people who are trying to make themselves better by not being able to accept the differences in others who will say, “May I pray for Joseph?” Well, if it makes you feel better. Then they go into a chat where they pray to a god to “Fix” my son….which just pisses me off even more. There’s nothing wrong with Joseph, nothing that needs fixed. Joseph only knows one life and that’s the one into which he was born. As shitty and traumatic as it was, Joseph doesn’t remember what happened to him during labor and delivery, and he knows no other life. If someone wants to make their self feel better by praying for my son or saying “poor thing”, by all means do so, but don’t put on a show for others and think there’s something that needs fixed.
Third, there’s the group of people who treat my son like humans should be treated. Those are the people who ask me what his name is, what toys he likes, what kind of music he likes. They are usually the same people who not stare at Joseph like he’s a monster or a freak and will smile when they see his handsome face. They look past any outright obvious differences, because, guess what? They DON’T MATTER!
Joseph is an amazing little boy, handsome as can be, usually happy (which is more than I can say about most people WITHOUT any disability). He sings, he laughs, he gets mad. He loves to cuddle, he loves loud noise and music. He loves warm water and swinging on a swing. Did I mention he loves to cuddle? He loves to go for walks and feel the breeze in his face, he loves rough housing and playing with his amazing little sister Sarah.
